Foreigner is a Four Letter Word

This past Saturday my fantastisk project group mates from CBS and I conducted a Focus Group for Foreign Professionals in Denmark which gave me an opportunity to see a lot of old friends and Danish language classmates. It allowed us to catch up on each others lives since we saw each other last which ranged anywhere from 9 months to a couple of weeks and also discuss the very important topic of integrating into Danish society.

It occurred to me while I was taking Danish lessons that the textbooks were written for us. People who had left their home countries where they were fairly successful and had a fruitful career, to come to Denmark and be forced to start all over or maybe even 'holde en pause' from their careers. Some people took it better than others, but what we could all agree on was the fact that we were all a little bit lost until we found each other in Danish class.

As it happens, our semester project at CBS requires us to find an existing problem and create a real world solution, so we have decided to tackle a topic that is personally close to my heart and one that I experienced first hand and saw a huge gaping opportunity for improvement in. The fact that I was able to see old friends again was an added bonus to the overall process. We all helped one another find our feet through that difficult time. The least I could do, is use this wonderful opportunity to help future foreigners.

For any foreigner in Denmark interested in helping us define these services, please answer our short survey.

Christmas beer is here!

Every first Friday in November the country goes crazy for the release of Tuborg's Jul øl, otherwise known as Christmas beer and J-Day.

I heard about this tradition on one of my business trips to Denmark in 2007 and had a taste of the first brew on the night it was released last year while visiting my inlaws in Møn, but I have never experienced the event itself, while out and about in the city of Copenhagen.

All I can say is, now I understand the hype. First of all, beer trucks decorated with snow drive around the city with the brew, playing the Tuborg Christmas song, while friendly elves deliver beer and cheer at the neighborhood bodega. At some bodegas the beer is free for one hour and at others you might even get a little peep show. Yes, you read that correct.

Before the friendly elves arrived at our local watering hole, a topless Tuborg delivery girl made some little boys very happy with their first Christmas present of the year! God Jul!

Thank you for today

One of the fun things about getting your Masters in English in a land where English isn't the first language, is the fact that cultural traditions and local sayings end up getting mixed in with the daily dialog.

One of those quaint little traditions is how the Danes say "Tak for i dag" after they have spent an entire day with you, or even a few hours which is the case when you take classes at Copen- hagen Business School. "Tak for i dag" (pronounced "tahk for ee day") is literally translated to "Thank you for today" and at the end of each class my professors close their session with those four words and it makes me smile every time.

Another fun experience is doing project work (a common method used in Danish university systems) with native Danes and finding yourself stuck mid conversation on a word that just doesn't translate. Luckily for us, humor always translates so we often find ourselves laughing over words that just sound funny when put in an English context. Words like "width wind" which is tail wind, or wind that is going your way while on a bike or in a plane, etc.

Another part of the experience that goes with taking classes in English when you live in another country is getting used to words being pronounced wrong. Sometimes it takes a few seconds to figure out what they are trying to say, but you catch on quickly. The only thing that you can do is hope that the bad pronunciation doesn't rub off on you or your fellow classmates.

Chances are high it won't as most of these people have been speaking English since they were in the 3rd grade, and have little to no accent. Something that may take a lifetime for me to accomplish with the Danish language.

Totally 80's

Halloween isn't a holiday I celebrated regularly when I was in the USA. Dressing up as someone or something else wasn't really a thing I was excited about doing after the age of 10, but this year is different.

We found another couple that are into pop culture just as much as we are, so we have had a couple of themed parties. The first was Mad Men where we dressed up as the Draper's and the Sterling's and gave a nod to the classy, yet alcoholic time of the 60's and our latest themed party was a salute to the 80's and the time of Wallstreet. Gordon Gekko and Madonna never looked so good together!

Suspenders, leg warmers, crimped hair, and bad cocktails were all the rave. But the couple that topped the cake were our guests who had on authentic sweatshirts from the 80's. That beats the heck out of shopping at H&M, even if "what is old is new again" is the latest thing.

Harvesting the Grapes

Ever since I began drinking wine I have wanted to learn more about the process of making it. After visiting Napa Valley in 2005 I wanted to go back and visit a vineyard when they harvested the grapes. That opportunity came my way five years later on the island of Møn, at a vineyard owned by my husband's family, in the country of Denmark. It was a fantastic experience, and one that I hope to repeat one day.

We began in a very traditional Danish way, by having coffee, spandauer (otherwise known as danishes) and schnapps. We began picking the grapes at the location of the first vines, on a pig farm. You read that right. The first vines were on a pig farm. The Danes love their pork!

The second set of vines were on family land, where Tobias and I had our wedding reception. By the time we made it there it was lunchtime, so we had a very traditional Danish lunch of smørrebrød (rye bread with vegetable and meat toppings), pølser (hot dogs or sausages) and beer.

After the second set of grapes were picked, it was time to stomp the grapes. The only grapes they stomp are the tiny little port wine grapes so I was able to partake in this time honored tradition made popular by Lucille Ball (and Pretty Woman) and happily check one of the things off my 'to do' list!

What up with Dutch?

There is a common misconception between Denmark and Holland (otherwise known as the Netherlands) in America. I'm not sure why, but for some reason Danish is confused with Dutch.

If you were to tell anyone from those two respecting countries that they were mistaken for one another they would get a confused look and then they would strongly state that the languages sound nothing alike. According to Danes, Dutch is more guttural.

If you were to ask an American, they probably wouldn't be able to hear the difference and that's not to say they should. It's all about what you are used to. I wouldn't be able to hear a difference either had I not lived in Denmark and had gotten used to the language.

However, this isn't necessarily about the language. I think it is more about word play than anything else. People from Holland are Dutch, and people from Denmark are Danish. A "danish" is a type of pastry in the US, not necessarily a culture or language.

The countries aren't anywhere near each other on a map. Denmark (a little more north and further east) is a relatively small country somewhere in Scandinavia, whereas Amsterdam, is capital of the Netherlands and a popular destination for many in the US (between Germany and Belgium).

The Dutch are known for wooden shoes, van Gogh, tulips, windmills, canals and bikes. The Danish are known for LEGO, the little mermaid, daisies, windmills, canals and bikes. In fact, one of the canal neighborhoods in Copenhagen (Christianshavn) was built by a Dutch architect and inspired by Amsterdam, so if you were to break it down that way, you could easily see the similarities.

Either way, I hope this little blog entry clears the whole thing up and inspires you to politely correct the next person you hear call someone from Denmark, Dutch. I'm sure the Danes will thank me for that one later.

Mad About Mad Men

My new favorite show on American television is Mad Men, brought to my attention early this summer by my good friend Beth.

It's a show about the advertising men of Madison Avenue in the 1960's and fantastically delivers all the old school glamour and intoxication of that time.

On top of being an entertaining show with witty one liners, I've always had a 'thing' for the 50's and 60's. There's just something about the history and style of that time that is so intriguing.

So after three seasons of the show, we decided to have a 1960's style dinner party to celebrate the final episode of season three.

Turns out, we're not the only ones. After a little searching, this sleepy little AMC series which premiered in the States in July 2007, has gotten quite the fan following, not to mention Emmy and Golden Globe acclaim.

Where have I been? Oh yeah...living in a foreign country.

However, it was fantastic. From the food, to the costumes, to the themed cocktails of that time, we had a fabulous time and did Roger & Jane and Don & Betty proud!

The Tribe

I went to a very interesting seminar titled "The Danes...(are weird)." The turnout was fairly large which obviously meant the title of the event struck a cord for those of us expats living in Denmark. However, the most impressive part was the fact that the speaker was an anthropologist looking at the culture from a sociological perspective.

He used humor and humility to describe situations and experiences expats often have a hard time understanding from a historical and scientific point of view. He described the Danes as a tribe of people with a special language of their own that is very difficult to imitate and learn as an outsider.

The "weird" part about the people was that they trust one another more than any other culture. In fact, they almost treat each other like family. So when you're all one big family, you don't always use manners in the public sense of the word, which most of us outsiders have a hard time understanding.

However, since I have made an effort to learn their secret language, and think of them as all one giant tribe now, it has definitely helped me in situations where I would have been upset in the past. His final words were perhaps the most powerful: "You don't have to understand it or even like it, but you have to respect it."

Transients

The wonderful part about living in another country and meeting like minded people in similar situations is there is an instant bond. You may not have hung in the same circles or even lived in the same city in your home country, but here it doesn't matter.

Other times the only thing you have in common is that you speak the same language, but when you are living in a foreign speaking country, that is truly music to your ears.

The sad part about meeting these people is they eventually return to their home countries or move onto their next adventure and it is uncertain when or where you might see each other again. It gives an entirely new meaning to enjoying the present.

That is the case for three wonderful ladies I met over the past year and had many good times and laughs with, so I'd like to dedicate this blog entry to them.

Thank you for making life in Denmark a little bit lighter (despite the lack of sun) Marie fra Frankrig, and Maren & Mandy from California! Copenhagen won't be the same without you.

Master Mind

Today is the beginning of the next two years of my life in Denmark. The first lecture in Strategic Market Creation at Copenhagen Business School begins.

Most everyone that goes to university in Denmark graduates with a Masters degree, so this was a logical decision when it comes to career, coupled with the fact that I have been wanting to go back to school since I started working in the real world.

Intro week was last week and besides feeling really weird talking about my 'husband' while in college, I was impressed with the material we will be absorbing ourselves with over the next two years, and the classmates I will work with on a weekly basis.

Project work is a common method used in the Danish educational system which is very different from the independent study in most American universities so that will be different for me, but in a good way. It's very practical and realistic in terms of preparing you for the real world.

Another bonus is the fact that I have a 'husband' who enjoys learning more than anyone I know, which means he will be available to bounce questions or theories off of regularly. That's one competitive advantage I wouldn't have, had I gone back to school right after my Bachelors.

Seriously Missing Summer

I moved to Denmark a year ago in May. When I arrived it was rainy and cold and I could not under-stand for the life of me how the women could wear sandals and pretend it was summer. June 09 wasn't much better, but we lucked out for our wedding with a little bit of sunshine. By the time we made it back from the States in August we enjoyed a few more weeks of warmth.

This year has been my first official, full summer in Denmark and I knew not to expect the humid highs of the Midwest, but I was anxiously anticipating the day I could actually wear a summer dress. Those days arrived sometime in July, and lasted pretty much exactly one month. It is late August and long gone are those summer dresses.

When you come from the Midwest you live for your summers. The season starts at the Memorial Day holiday (late May) and ends with Labor Day weekend (end of August). Sometimes we're even lucky enough to get a little Indian Summer in September, but either way you can pretty much count on at least three months of nice weather.

Those summer months get you through the long, hard winters. So when you reside in Denmark and live through one of the coldest winters on record in 25 years, you need a little more than one month of summer.

Sister Visit

My baby sister took her very first flight EVER to come visit me in Denmark. If anyone knows Steph, that shouldn't surprise them. She's always been a daredevil and has never really been afraid of anything.

It has been an absolute pleasure to watch her absorb an entirely new culture, country, and language which she has wholeheartedly tried to speak. Especially when we were visiting my husband's family, who speak little English. She even made up a new word: "Velbetak." It's Velbekomme and Tak all rolled into one. Thanking and Welcoming someone all at the same time. Brilliant!

Any time friends or family visit, it gives you a chance to do all the touristy things you haven't tried yet, which I am very much looking forward to. Things like going to see the Crowned Jewels at Rosenborg Castle or taking a tour of Christiania to learn the history of how an abandoned military barracks could turn into an "Alternative City" based on communal living and freedom.

However, the best memories are those moments when you see your loved ones experiencing something for the very first time, like swimming in the ocean.

Viking Holiday

For my thirty faux birthday, my husband and I in true Viking style, took to the sea for a weekend of leisure. We sailed to Oslo to check out Norwegian country.

This was especially fun for me as I was surrounded by my own little Norway in the Midwest as a child. I grew up next to a little town called Westby, where a lot of Norwegians settled. Names like Hansen and Petersen were very common to me in school which is probably one of the reasons I have felt right at home here in Scandinavia.

Sailing into Oslo I also realized why they must have felt right at home when they settled into the US. Wisconsin is a spitting image of Norway. For a second we felt like we were on the Mississippi River, not the Oslofjord Bay. Hills and valleys of green speckled with houses of yellow and red. It was beautiful, and actually made me a little homesick.

Change of Dress

Summer has finally bestowed its lovely self upon Denmark and I am happily smiling while I sweat it out. AC is not the norm in this earth friendly country which means the buses and trains are stifling and sometimes it's hard to sleep at night, but who needs sleep when you have warm summer nights to enjoy!

I never thought I would get a chance to bust out my summer dresses, tank tops, and flip flops in this Scandinavian land, but the past month or so has been absolutely gorgeous and provided plenty of opportunities to soak up the rays.

One thing that is definitely different however is how strong the sun is. In the Midwest we only need to be wary between 12pm and 2pm. Here, I can sit out after 3pm and still get tan, or burnt.

Another thing that is different is how young everyone dresses. Leggings and stripes can be seen in all seasons, but my favorite is when I see modern and stylish women in their prime years of life not afraid to show a little leg. Now that's something to aspire to!

Back to School

After a year of planning and waiting and insisting that I qualify - I have finally been accepted to a Masters Program at Copenhagen Business School. This was a close call and a battle almost lost because of the differences in my American education but I am happily toting my bags to summer school so I can 'officially' be accepted come Fall.

This means I have to take my nemesis of a class called Accounting and then the subject that is like breathing to me called Marketing. Why Marketing is a requirement completely baffles me, but I knew I was two tiny little nothing points short on the requirements in Accounting. So I am struggling through. Actually the subject matter isn't so bad, it's the time intensive problem solving that sucks the life out of you.

My professors are American, so I get a little taste of home during each lecture and while I still sometimes want to throw my Accounting book into the bin, I channel my good friend in the USA, the CPA, and try to appreciate the language of Accounting.

The Hats are Back

It's that time of year again when Danish high school students walk around the city proudly wearing their graduation hats to signify to the rest of the world they are close to completing their education. Another reminder of that tradition is when groups of recent grads drive around the city in decorated trucks honking and screaming to the world that they are finished with school.

The first time I witnessed this unique Danish tradition last year I was shocked and confused as it goes against the quiet and introverted way Danes live their private lives, but I found myself smiling at the students wearing the hats this year and have even found the screaming and honking endearing. It sort of reminds me of homecoming parades back in the day, back in the US of A.

It's truly amazing what a year can do to your perspective! I am either becoming more Danish or less affected by the differences between our two countries.

One Year Wiser

A year ago today my husband and I began the journey called marriage. Every new couple adjusts to this new status differently, but when you are a bi-country couple, the obstacles are automatically higher.

No matter where you live, one person is always outside of their normal surroundings or home country. Away from family, friends, condo, city and the job that you love. Without all of these things, it requires you to figure out the kind of person you are.

It requires a lot of patience, understanding, listening, and expectation checking. It forces you to be honest about the things that you really need in your life to make you happy, and to let go of the things that just aren't as important.

At the end of the day, or month, or year, I have come away from my experience in a foreign land and in a new relationship status, a little bit wiser. I have realized it is not what you have that defines you and makes you happy. It's who you have in your life.

Homecoming

Last weekend we made the annual trip to Germany to stock up on beer, liquor, soda, and confections. That may sound strange, but as it turns out Danish products are cheaper in Germany than they are in Denmark. So the Danes go across the border to bring their goods back home.

Since Germany basically borders Denmark, and is just a 45 minute ferry ride away, it is a fairly normal procedure. What I witnessed was families with "ferry picnics" fueling up on food and drink before the marathon race in the border shop, which reminded me of a Costco or Sam's Club back in the US, where buying in bulk is the main attraction.

The same happens with the Swedes. They come to Denmark to load up on alcohol because it is cheaper in Denmark than in Sweden. However, the Danes go to Sweden for clothes for the same reason. Confusing yes, but all I know is this.

Wherever you live in the world, there is always something else, somewhere close where you can get a better deal. For the Wisconsinite, that's shopping for clothes in Minnesota and for the Chicagolander, that's buying Fireworks in Wisconsin. The only difference is you don't need a passport.

Royal Modernists

Denmark may have the oldest monarchy in the world, but the successors to the throne are young, modern and vibrant.

The latest royal tourist attraction open to the public is the renovated apartment of the Crown Prince Frederik and Crown Princess Mary in the Amalienborg Castle located in downtown Copenhagen.

I took the time to be a tourist for a day and grabbed a sneak peak inside the lives of Royals. What I found was a traditional castle turned into a modern living space. The backdrop of the castles gold rimmed doors and crystal chandeliers were complimented by colorful wall paintings and murals selected by some of Denmark's finest artists.

My favorite room was called "The World Room" which had a contemporary, almost rock and roll feel to it with black walls and white outlines of continents and countries with personal touches and messages, only those close to the Royals may understand. Tasmania was clearly marked, as that is where the Crown Princess is from, and I have a sneaky suspicion the Crown Prince may be a fan of Soundgarden.

The space that took the cake however, was the stairway to additional floors. Amazing, almost indescribable circular lights emerged from the walls designed with criss cross lit tubing reflected by mirrors giving the space a warm glow. Complimenting the look was a silver constructed piece of art hanging on the ceiling several floors above made to look like waves.

I left feeling grateful I took the time to visit and inspired to keep working on my own little castle in the land where tradition and modern design collide.

Amazing Møn

The fields are alive with the color yellow on the island of Møn. Raps or Rapeseed is in full bloom and it is a beautiful sight to see. Fields of yellow and green, with a blue sky backdrop. It almost doesn't look real but then again, this is the land of fairy tales and Hans Christian Andersen.

Every year on Pinse Sunday my husband's family gathers for breakfast in the woods at a place called called Fanefjord Skovpavilion and every year I am grateful to be a part of this brilliant tradition and fantastic family. Not to mention, given an excuse to visit the exquisite island they are from.

Just an hour and a half from the city, Møn is a world away from anything else I have ever seen. If I had to describe how it looks I would say Door County and Cape Cod combined. I am instantly at ease when we cross over the bridge. Similar to how I used to feel living and working in Chicago and escaping to Wisconsin for the weekend.

The common denominator in both scenarios is family, and I believe the Danish expression for the feeling that brings would be 'hyggeligt.'

Cykel Style

The entire month of May has been dedicated to my daily commute to Danish class "på cykel" and it feels great. When the weather cooperates there is no better mode of personal transportation or way to see Copenhagen at its best.

It takes me the same amount of time to get into the center of the city from where we live by bike as it does by train, so unless I have an appointment or meeting after class I would much rather go by bike. You're saving the planet AND getting some exercise!

Of course your sense of personal style may suffer for the sake of the journey. I see many women on bikes with dresses and heels and I admire them. Unfortunately for me, I am not able to do a leisurely bike ride. Partly because my daily round trip is ten miles and secondly, because my brain still registers the bike as a form of exercise equipment.

My habitual race to make the green light, has just been transferred to another form of transportation. Not to mention the fact that all those spinning classes start to register in my brain and I cycle way harder than I need to, but I don't know any other way to do it. It's in my DNA. I come from a family of fast walkers. If you need to get somewhere, you put a little gas in your step, pedal to the metal, or in this case wind in your spokes!

Holiday Season

Holiday season has arrived in Denmark and I'm not talking about Christmas and New Years. Easter kicks it off with a 4-5 day weekend and the rest of the public holidays follow suit.

It starts with Store Bededag or General Prayer Day the 4th Friday after Easter. A day that consolidates a bunch of holy days into one big (or store) day of reflection. Also known as a day when a lot of Danes get confirmed.

40 days after Easter there is Kristi Himmelfartsdag or Ascension Day, which typically turns into two days. I have to be honest, anything with 'fart' in the middle of the name is sort of hard to take seriously as a native English speaker.

The Spring holiday bonanza stops 7 weeks after Easter when the Danes celebrate Pinsedag or Whit Sunday, recognized on Monday. To sum up, there are approximately 6 public holidays between May 1st and June 5th, the last being Constitution Day in Denmark.

For a country that has proclaimed themselves as people to not be very religious, they sure have a lot of publicly recognized holidays that are based around church holidays. No judgment, just a reflection. How apropos!

Feels like Home

Last night my American girlfriends, otherwise known as "the book club girls", and I had dinner at one of the best Mexican restaurants in Copenhagen, luckily enough just minutes from where I live.

The restaurant is called Que Pasa and it's located on a little side street in Vanløse, just blocks from where Van Morrison was inspired to write the song "Vanløse Stairway" about his Danish girlfriend back in the 80's.

The owner is from the US, grew up in Southern California, and was raised on Mexican food, just like one of our fellow book club members. Needless to say, the food was authentic, the service refreshingly American, and we found a new place to frequent whenever we get homesick.

The Beach Boys were playing on the radio, the food was delicious, and everywhere we turned we seemed to run into a another native American also living in Denmark. In fact, the woman who took this picture!

It was one of those nights when you wake up smiling the morning after. That's when you know it is starting to feel like home.

The Stare Down

I went on and on about my fabulous new cykel in my last blog, and now that I've gotten the hang of it, I truly enjoy it. But because I'm an American and I refuse to ride it in the rain, I spend most of my days taking public transportation. That's just a fact of living in Denmark.

While on the train, or bus, or wherever, you begin to notice a lot of things. Human behavioral type things. One, is that no one says "Excuse me" when they get up, sit down, or push you around. Two, is that people stare. Especially if you don't fit the 'norm.'

I thought it was just me, but my husband has started to notice it as well. In the US, we're told as children that "Staring is rude" so naturally we don't do it. If someone stares at you for an odd amount of time, chances are A) they think you're attractive or B) they may have a few screws loose upstairs.

However, if it becomes uncomfortable, all you need to do is stare at them back and they will snap back into reality and look away. Not in Denmark! That human behavioral register doesn't exist here. I've tried it. All you get is a really uncomfortable stare down...and then more stares.

Easy Rider

It's Spring and I decided that I will join the gangs of other bicyclers on the Copenhagen bike paths and start riding my brand spankin' new cykel to Danish class...hver dag!

First of all, just writing this sentence gave me butterflies in my stomach because the bikers here are no joke. They are serious, experienced, 'been riding their bike everyday' people since they were like 5 years old. (Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating a bit, but still. A long time).

It's also been a long time since I've ridden a bike. Now, I would hop on one every now and then during vacations over the years but the last time I seriously used it for a mode of transportation was when I rode my ten-speed to the swimming pool during summer back in high school. Yep, that long ago.

So I'm easing into it. Got the bike, next up is the helmet. That was a promise to the husband and one I'll gladly oblige since my first spin around the lake in our neighborhood was a bit shaky. Almost wiped out trying to jump a curb when I realized I had turned into a bike path...going the wrong way. It was the exact same feeling you have when you turn down a one way street driving a car.

All I have to say is this. Whoever coined the phrase: "It's just like riding a bike" must have always ridden one. Or maybe after a 2nd and 3rd trip I'll get the hang of it and then the point is moot. After all, my helmet's just too cute to waste!

Beautiful Barcelona

My husband and I just visited Barcelona and were overcome with how gorgeous it was. Architecturally, we knew Gaudi was going to be impressive, but we were not prepared for the everyday beauty of ordinary buildings. It makes the city feel like a walking museum.

One of the first things I noticed (besides the buildings) was that motor bikes are as common in Barcelona as bicycles are in Copenhagen. People smoke more, it's still allowed inside restaurants and bars, and the food is small but very fatty. Our modest Danish systems were shocked into vacation mode after the burst of flavors of our first tapas dinner.

There are two differences I noticed that were my favorites. One is that they eat really late. I prefer our 7pm Danish dinner time to the 10pm Spanish time to be honest, but what makes this one of my favorite things is the fact that 6 or 7pm is still considered "the afternoon" in Spain. Even the ATM's say: "Buenas Tardes!"

My favorite experience of all though was how warm the Spanish people were. They don't speak a lot of English but that doesn't necessarily matter to them. They will continue to talk to you in Spanish thinking that somehow you will magically understand them. What ends up happening is a lot of funny moments and shared laughter after "deer in the headlight" stares. Embarrassing at first, but endearing in the end.

Friends

The longer I live in Denmark, the more I am fascinated by the affect the American TV show Friends has on the global population. Especially for those that want to learn how to speak English.

When I met my husband I thought it was cute that he knew all of the Friends shows by heart and referenced them frequently in real life situations, similar to the way me and my girls do with Sex and the City. However, the more people I meet in Copenhagen, the more I am told how Friends helped them learn English. More importantly, Friends made them WANT to learn English.

This takes the show to a whole new level. Not only are Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey beloved because they made us in the US laugh at them and in turn ourselves, but they inspire non speakers to actually want to learn to speak their language. Now that's what I call a global phenomenon.

Where is the Love?

Most of my Danish experiences over the past 10 months have been positive but one that simply continues to boggle my mind is the lack of public courtesy. For the most part I have found the Danes to be extremely kind people, but you would never know that when you are out in public with them.

I talked about this a little in my "Ode to the US of A" post in January, but it continues to be the most pressing question and noticed characteristic of Danish people amongst foreigners and/or the people I see everyday in Danish class. We are a class of approximately 15 people from all corners of the world so our different cultures are discussed on a regular basis.

Why can't the Danes just say "Excuse me" or "Undskyld"? ... is the question asked over and over again. The reason this is asked, is because you will rarely get an acknowledgement that anything ever happened if you get bumped on the street, metro, bus, wherever. You will simply get pushed out of the way with complete disregard.

One theory is that this change in public courtesy happened 50 years ago when the formal use of "you" or "De" was mostly removed from the Danish language which only left the informal "du." Public perspective changed and a flat hierarchy was incorporated. Everyone was equal and treated the same. Instead of treating everyone with respect, which is what happens in most cultures, the Danes decided to do the opposite.

My theory is based around the fact that "hygge" is such a big part of Danish daily lives, that things left unsaid in the name of "keeping it cozy" fester over time. Naturally, those emotions need to come out somehow. Unfortunately, the victims are perfect strangers. Or maybe I'm just over analyzing it. This, quite honestly wouldn't be the first time! After all, they call this Viking country for a reason.

The L is a 3 Letter Word

My last visit to Chicago was more than just a cozy visit down memory lane, it was the first time I looked at the city through EU eyes. What struck me most was how OLD the beloved 'L' was. Now, I took the L almost everyday of my city life in Chicago, so I say this with the deepest sincerity.
For those that aren't familiar, the 'L' refers to the train or rapid transport system as it is defined by Wikipedia, that takes Chicagoans around the city by public transport. However, after riding Copenhagen's S trains and Metro, rapid it is not.

In worst possible conditions Copenhagen public transporters have to wait 20 minutes at the most. Normally an S train comes every 7-12 minutes and there are signs which tell you how long you have to wait. The Metro is even faster. In my new neighborhood where I have access to both, I have never waited more than 5 minutes for a train and can make it into the center of the city in less than 10.

To add insult to injury, the trains are also clean and quiet. There are garbage bags that people actually use to put their trash in. Conversation is kept to a minumum and there are also 'silent zones' to guarantee peace and quiet during your commute.

Chicago has a new Transit Authority president that was leading the charge of the much needed renovations before I left, but finding the funds for a society built on cars and gasoline may be his biggest challenge.

Human Nature

More than just a magnificent Michael Jackson song, human nature versus nuture is an age old debate that really hit home after my last visit to the US to meet my 6 week old nephew.

This little man was born with personality, preferences, and physical traits of both parents. I clearly witnessed the fact that he liked to be held just a little bit longer after he wakes versus after he eats and likes to be bounced when he's tired, not to mention given attention when he's put down. He's a cuddler and attention seeker. One could say he also got that from his parents.

However, what really hit home hard was the fact that his nurturing was going to have to be cut short due to the shotty maternity benefits in the US and that infuriated me. In 6 short weeks he will be put in a daycare center where hopefully the care providers have enough time to take care of his needs, but most likely he will just have to adapt to their schedule and availability.

Right now he is at home in his safe little environment being nurtured and although there are arguments on either side for what is better for the social skills and discipline of the child, there is no argument in my mind that Denmark's policy that a child should be with his mother for the first 6 months of his life is the most humane one.

New Digs in DK

The entire month of January was pretty much dedicated to preparing ourselves for the official move to our new home in Vanløse the weekend before February 1st. However, nothing could have prepared us for the blizzard like conditions on actual moving weekend.

The difference between a Danish move and an American move is in DK moves happen year round, whereas we typically move in the Spring, Summer, Fall in the Midwest when the weather is mild and favorable for such things. In Copenhagen, reasonably priced apartments for rent are as hard to come by as a cheap latte so when you find one you like, you take it right then and there.

We woke on January 30th to the biggest snow storm of the season yet. Møn, where Tobias' parents live, was hit the hardest. We knew the van we had lined up wasn't going to make the trip, but Tobias' Dad wasn't giving up just yet. He test drove the roads, decided they weren't "too slippery" and made the 2 hour trip to Copenhagen.

Four trips back and forth and a trailer rental later we were all packed into our new home thanks to the will and determination of Ib and Marianne Møller. It's only February and they deserve the "Parents of the Year" award.

Damp Dansk Virus

This has been the coldest winter Denmark has had in 25 years. My husband jokes that I brought the cold with me being from the Midwest. Maybe so, but I certainly did not bring the nasty symptoms that come from living with the daily damp cold.

First let me start by saying it is January and I have been sick twice in the same month. That's never happened before. I caught your average cold on New Years Day that was over in about a week or two. Cold symptoms are the same wherever you are in the world. However, this second illness has thrown me for a loop. Knife cutting throat pains combined with stomach flu like symptoms.

I swore I had strep throat or some sort of bacterial infection but I saw the Doctor the same day I called and I was totally normal. No fever, strep or bacteria, it must have been a virus. After talking to my husband and a few other Danes, it sounds like these are normal winter weather symptoms. Apparently my American immune system wasn't prepared for the damp dansk virus.

Ode to the US of A

In many ways I have a lot of respect for my new home. In fact, the majority of my posts have delighted in the differences of my new country, but there are simply some things the US does better and I miss them dearly during daily Danish life.

+ 1 USA: Customer Service. In the US there is the expression "The customer comes first" or "The customer is always right." This goes for any situation that puts you at the service of someone else and most people or places exceed your expectations. If not at first, with a little encouragement they will appease your request.

-1 DK: In Denmark the employee is first. There are no exceptions or special requests because of any inconvenience on your end. They play by the rules. In restaurants they leave you alone to enjoy your meal rather than checking to see if everything is alright. That is fine when you want to have a nice leisurely dinner, but not if you're on a schedule, or need more water.

+2 USA: Street Courtesy. In any town in America if someone runs into you on the street or bumps into you in a store there is usually an immediate reaction or response. An "I'm sorry" or "Excuse me." It wasn't intended, it was a mistake, the store/street is crowded, etc., etc.

-2 DK: In Denmark it's like a game of chicken on the street. The one who looks the most determined gets the right of way. There are no qualms about bumping into you. Sometimes I actually think they find joy in forcing their way through an impossible gap between you and the person next to you in a crowd. I miss manners.

+3 USA: Doggie Doo. In the US you rarely see piles of poo laying in the middle of the sidewalk without the owner immediately picking up after him or her. Some dog owners may leave it in the grass, but never in the middle of the sidewalk. It's either a known responsibility or there are signs reminding you it is your duty to pick up the doo.

-3 DK: Yep, you guessed it. In Denmark there are piles of poo laying in the sidewalk just waiting for pedestrians to step in and carry throughout the city and back into their homes. It's disgusting. I am now used to looking down at all times to dodge the doo.

Dear USA, may you always treat the customer first, instill manners, and pick up after your pets.

Cheaper by the Dozen

On January 7, 2010 my baby sister had her first baby. Baby sister of course only refers to the order of things. She handled the labor like a pro and has an entirely new world opening up to her. One that she will teach me about when the time comes. Still, when it comes to Sarah I have always had older sister protective tendencies and the overwhelming need to take care and defend.

Now it's her turn to take care of someone else. Sawyer James Turben makes the 12th grandchild of Am and Jarda, 6th nephew, and 4th godson of mine. The feeling of a new baby in your arms is one of the best no matter how many you have and I can hardly wait to hold this little creation come February.

Throughout the pregnancy Sawyer had already taken on traits of his father. Mom was calm and mellow and happy throughout, just like baby. The little bean would respond to his Daddy's voice at night and kick like crazy when Mom had sweets. Time will tell how the little guy turns out but I can already see Sawyer and Jamie walking around the back yard feeding the birds. Buds since birth.

Hej Hej 2009, Hello 2010!

2009 was a very good year. When I reflect on the year that was I feel grateful for the good fortune of my family and friends. Tobias and I were married and several close friends including my sister got pregnant. All were long awaited events, or unexpected surprises. History was also made. A new President in the US and the Timmerman's in Europe.

2010 has gotten off to a good start with a new address in Copenhagen. A home we can call "ours." We move into our new digs February 1st so the month of January will be busy planning and preparing and moving. Something I just finished doing with my entire US existence 6 months earlier.

Next on the Danish wish list is a job. Then daily life as I once knew it will begin anew. With different surroundings and a new professional experience in a foreign land and funny language.